I appreciate that taking care of needed tasks is important for Bill, even if it has to be chipped away at, a little at a time. Things like shoveling snow, gardening, laundry, etc, etc. Even dog-poop duty in the back yard! He doesn't seem to mind much that the task needs doing, only that his ability to do it as fast/well as he would like to is limited. One thing Bill appreciated about Kris' visit was, as they stepped into the garage, Kris exclaimed over how much better it looked than the last time he visited, and praised Bill for accomplishing so much. That made his day! It is wonderful to get credit for what one has worked on so dutifully, whenever his energy and time would permit.
I appreciate Bill for the friendship he offers my children. He has never tried to replace their father, but just plain enjoys their company. He never tries to make anyone (his own children, mine, aquaintances, friends) be a certain way to be accepted by him. He knows that love does not diminish because it is shared with more people, it grows to include however many may choose to join our circle of family and friends. At times he is saddened by choices others may make, deeply grieved sometimes, but believes firmly in the principle of agency. Bill often comforts me by reminding me that what really counts is what Heavenly Father knows about our efforts and hearts and works, not whether others accept them. In these things Bill is very Christ-like. He is not perfect, and never claimed to be. He has a Christ-like acceptance of others for who they really are.
I like that Bill is a good sport about things I get enthusiastic about. This is Bill's gingerbread nativity that he good-naturedly made even tho the frosting I made wouldn't hold together well! Doing crafts and projects was a totally new thing for him to be involved in, or surrounded by, but it is growing on him. I remember Sister Marjorie Hinckley saying something about how her husband encouraged her "to soar" in developing her talents and interests, and supported her efforts. Bill wanted to buy me a new sewing machine, something I hadn't even considered. He was so kind and complimentary that I quit resisting because of money, and enjoyed researching and picking one out for my Christmas gift. The prophet Joseph Smith was well known for his helping Emma with chores and childcare that some thought was unbecoming of his station as prophet. He taught all through example that "righteous dominion" of the offices of the Priesthood, including the Patriarch of a home, requires service and kindness, even as Jesus Christ served. When I was overwhelmed by gifts, sewing, wrapping, scheduling, etc, there were many times that I was getting ready to stop to make dinner, when Bill would come in and say, "So you can keep working, how would it be if I did this for supper?" or something similar. That made me feel so appreciated! And the things I am able to do for him, he is so appreciative of. That means a lot. I think of the times Jesus helped his disciples with where to cast their nets, and had a meal prepared for them on the shore, and fed them before he taught them. I am sure they felt filled and uplifted by these acts of service.
I appreciate Bill for his appreciation and enjoyment of simple things. He tries to focus on the good things about whatever happens. We both do. He is a thankful man. That is a huge thing in this day and age. Huge. And rare. (This is at Heidi's house when she let us hold the newborn puppies.)
Thanks, Bill, for a successful 2008. We made it through a lot. Thank you for choosing the cancer procedure that lets you be around at least 20 more years, even tho it was painful and not fun, and took so much out of you. Thank you for your kind heart and good intentions and love. Thank you for choosing me, and being amazed and grateful for the Lord's hand in our lives. Thank you for your love, and for being grateful for mine. Happy New Year!
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